A note to readers: I’m trying something new this week, adding a “bonus materials” section at the very bottom of the post. Let me know if you enjoy this feature.
It feels like a rite of passage upon leaving conservative Christianity: first you start voting Democrat, then you figure out that you’re bisexual, and then you get really into tarot cards. I don’t make the rules, people!
Whether it’s due to the decline in organized religion, the pandemic, or our visual, Instagram-ified world, tarot use has exploded in the last several years. Two years ago the Washington Post declared that tarot was “having a moment” but, if my social media feeds are anything to go off of, that moment is far from over.
Tarot feels like the right bookend to this month of exploring spiritual rituals. My first foray into tarot cards was actually for a series I wrote for an exvangelical blog about trying stuff that was forbidden during my upbringing. I played with a ouija board, took a burlesque class, and got my tarot cards read. For so much of my childhood I’d feared demons would attack me if I did any of these things, so it was very empowering to face these fears. It also reaffirmed my sense of agency in figuring out what I believed.
While I went into that reading snarky and skeptical, I recall leaving the reading feeling convinced that TAROT WAS REAL AND TAROT READERS CAN SEE THE FUTURE!!!!
(This is a tendency I notice in myself and others leaving a controlling belief system. We tend to be as gullible as the Mole Women from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt.)
After some reflection, I came to a more ambivalent place about tarot. Can tarot readers see the future? Probably not. Does it feel good to have a card say something nice about you? Absolutely. When my reader told me that my 8 of Wands meant forward momentum, likening it to the opening of Pandora’s Box, I felt inspired. I wanted to believe it was real and I also knew that wanting something to be true doesn’t make it so.
Realizing that I was still thinking about that reading four years later, I put a deck on my Christmas list. Did I realize I would be opening this gift in front of my husband’s very conservative grandmother? Nope! Worried she would think her great-grandchildren were being raised by a Satanist, I giggled and stammered that it was “just for fun” then went home and read the entire accompanying guidebook.
Learning how to read tarot was slow going. A deck has 78 cards, which each have their own meanings, plus a “reversed” meaning if it’s pulled upside down. I fumbled through performing readings for myself and tried to read my husband’s tarot without shuffling the deck well enough—three successive cards predicted he’d be fired from his job, which, luckily, has not happened. Some days the cards resonated with my current situation, and somedays they felt out of nowhere.
So, looking to improve my skills, this last week I took two online classes in tarot reading. The first, a free one-hour course from “High Priestess” Jenny Bell, was a general introduction to tarot. Bell speaks intelligently about Jungian archetypes and the subconscious before veering off into talk of clairvoyance, numerology, and angels. Where my previous reader, Xtina, distinctly said she wasn’t a fortune teller, Bell draws on a spirit world full of good and evil energies. One section of the video course, “Psychic Protection” kept malfunctioning, so I can’t even tell you what evil you’re opening yourself up to if you undertake tarot reading. Hopefully not something too severe. (Unless the evil spirits are attacking the “Psychic Protection” video itself in some kind of ingenious way of rendering us all defenseless against them?!)
The second class, “How to Read All 78 Tarot Cards in 30 Minutes!! Easier Than You Think,” was a little more practical to my needs. Maria Hayden of The Tarot Shop UK offered a quick run-down of the different designs (though she doesn’t address reversals.) Her tips helped me sound like I reasonably knew what I was talking about when I read cards for a friend and my mother-in-law, always a dicey preposition! I definitely pulled “The Devil” for both of them and felt awkward about it.
The biggest tip I gleaned from the two classes were that tarot is a story. The visual and storytelling components of tarot can speak to our intuition at a deep level. Like Bell said, the symbolism of the deck does feel of a piece with Jungian archetypes and The Hero’s Journey. While our culture is hyper-focused on giving language to all experiences, I do think the cards help tap into something that’s easier to feel than explain.
Like all the rituals I tried this month (prayer, ancestor veneration, altar building) your mileage may vary. The great thing about being a self-described “heretic” is the freedom to play with spiritual practices and not worry about orthodoxy. For you, tarot might be a party trick or a form of prayer. Either way, leaving conservative Christianity behind means you’re free to experiment without fear of demon possession. Whereas the Christianity I inherited emphasized perfection and no tolerance for failure, the spirituality I’m practicing these days tends to be more playful and experimental. As my yoga teacher wisely said, “The opposite of perfection isn’t imperfection, it’s play.”
How do you use tarot cards in your spiritual practice? Or are there other forms of spirituality you’re curious about playing with? Feel free to journal about it or write in the comments so we can learn from each other.
Have a friend who’s a bisexual Democrat tarot enthusiast? Why not share this post with them?
This week’s BONUS MATERIALS:
Flamy Grant’s appropriately themed new single, “Fortune Teller”
Our wonderful Katy, I loved that you read my Tarot cards. I hold no ill will even though I received the devil card. You always keep life interesting in this family which we love! Just remember - Naner will be here for Thanksgiving!
Girl, I just had my first Tarot reading on Saturday! 😂