So much about your experience resonates… the strangeness of being seen as wounded, not capable; grief manifesting as lethargy and snappiness; the inability to focus while reading. Grief is such a unique, personal experience, yet also universal - thank you for sharing this.
This is so beautifully articulated. The aloneness, the snappiness, the clutching to self-compassion. 💔
I’m reading Maggie’s book right now too. It’s just so good. And I understand the seasons where books are just too much for an overwhelmed mind and heart. Go gently, they will return. ❤️🩹❤️🩹
"Really, I think I worried that others would implicate me in his inability to overcome his addiction, like if I had just loved him enough or cared for him the right way, he could’ve found the strength to quit."
Feeling this. ❤️ Shaking my fist at our inner critics / Bill Murrays!
Thanks so much for sharing this perspective, Katy! My dad died from poor health assisted suicide (as I call when I like to make people squirm) three months into us resuming contact after having years of silence. I’d been mourning and grieving the loss of our relationship for such a long time, that when he passed I wondered if something was wrong with me for not grieving in the way I thought people expected now that my loss was truly visible.
By the by, having experienced both death and divorce I can say the parallels in grieving are strong. Adding the book to my reading list.
So much about your experience resonates… the strangeness of being seen as wounded, not capable; grief manifesting as lethargy and snappiness; the inability to focus while reading. Grief is such a unique, personal experience, yet also universal - thank you for sharing this.
Fucking Bill Murray.
This is so beautifully articulated. The aloneness, the snappiness, the clutching to self-compassion. 💔
I’m reading Maggie’s book right now too. It’s just so good. And I understand the seasons where books are just too much for an overwhelmed mind and heart. Go gently, they will return. ❤️🩹❤️🩹
Grief is love prolonged.
I liked that when I read it.
I read it in a movie review in Sight and Sound, the movie magazine, so it's probably/possibly true. I think it's true.
Kind thoughts to you and yours.
"Really, I think I worried that others would implicate me in his inability to overcome his addiction, like if I had just loved him enough or cared for him the right way, he could’ve found the strength to quit."
Feeling this. ❤️ Shaking my fist at our inner critics / Bill Murrays!
Thanks so much for sharing this perspective, Katy! My dad died from poor health assisted suicide (as I call when I like to make people squirm) three months into us resuming contact after having years of silence. I’d been mourning and grieving the loss of our relationship for such a long time, that when he passed I wondered if something was wrong with me for not grieving in the way I thought people expected now that my loss was truly visible.
By the by, having experienced both death and divorce I can say the parallels in grieving are strong. Adding the book to my reading list.