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Daniel L. Bacon's avatar

Ha! Fundy-Baby-Voice--I hear my mom's voice in my head but she has quite a low voice anyway. I noticed it though when she is disagreeing with dad. Her voice becomes smaller and baby and since we were all homeschooled by her this is how we learned to disagree with someone we don't want to upset. Low volume, higher pitch, slow and baby. I wish comments/notes had voiceover options because it really is iconic and it drives my wife crazy when I revert to it.

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Katharine Strange's avatar

yes! I feel like this is a common tactic when "fawning"--you don't want to upset someone who might blow their lid, for example.

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Holly Starley's avatar

Fundie baby voice! I have not heard the term till now. But I soooooo recognize it.

Another great piece, my friend.

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Katharine Strange's avatar

thank you, Holly!

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Paulla Rich Estes (she/her)'s avatar

I hadn’t heard the term, Fundie Baby Voice, but as soon as I saw it here, I knew exactly what it was. And it made me feel violently angry - because I obviously still have work to do! Thanks for sharing this.

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Katharine Strange's avatar

I know the feeling! Recovery takes time, for sure. Hugs to you on your journey.

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Stephanie Alter Jones's avatar

I keep wondering why people aren’t calling out Ivanka for that voice- it’s so icky-fake-sounding

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Katharine Strange's avatar

yeah, she wasn’t raised in religious fundamentalism, but I can see a similar power mechanism at work in her family with her creepy dad

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Mikaela Blackler's avatar

I barely watch tv anymore, but I think the last thing I watched was Americas Sweethearts! With Reece, I marveled at her. For so much as I could never understand her, she felt very genuine.

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Katharine Strange's avatar

She's so talented and seems like a really kind person. I just hope that she doesn't wake up in a decade or two feeling like she has no idea who she is.

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Mikaela Blackler's avatar

I wouldn’t write off that possibility!

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Kendall Lamb's avatar

What a great read, thank you! I absolutely cannot NOT hear fundie baby voice now- I sat straight up and pointed at the screen when watching America's Sweethearts. It's disturbing and so familiar. (And I hadn't thought about the element of feighned naivete played in to this, but you're absolutely right.) I could not recommend more highly "Your Body is Not an Apology" by Sondra Renee Taylor. It takes divine embodiment to a new level.

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Katharine Strange's avatar

Yes, it's like nails on a chalkboard, isn't it? Thanks for the book rec, adding it to my list!

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Lindsey Melden's avatar

My own work around embodiment has been centered on learning to listen to my body. I ignored her for so so long. Somedays that looks like long walks, some days eating whatever I want, some days doing a slow yoga or feldenkrais practice, or just listening to music I love. Fundy baby voice is just another layer of emotional work that women do to console and comfort their emotionally immature men. Can’t wait to read tias book.

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Katharine Strange's avatar

Sometimes it just feels hard to uncover what my body even wants. I've gotten so good at ignoring it. Thanks for these ideas--I've seen "feldenkrais" advertised around Seattle, do you think I should try it?

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Lindsey Melden's avatar

I mean…it’s a very distinct practice and it is very slow and very much not “exercise” so as long as you have clear expectations I’ve found it to be a really nice practice. I also worked with my teacher in other capacities first (meditation, etc) so I knew that I connected to her and her style. It’s very slow intentional movement and retraining your brain.

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Lindsey Melden's avatar

Yesssss. I am HERE for an embodiment series. 👏🏽

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